Walking down the street, would you beat him up?

I probably would. JUST LOOK AT THAT ANNOYING OVERSEEN SHIRT, GOD.

Still unsure about this.

I'm often bored with my username, and I don't know why. I have my name, thats great! I have no clue why I'd desire a name change, but I often think about it.

What do you think about this?

Watch my Clockday submissions, here is the rundown on them!

1. True Love
Strawberryclock announces his love for Orangeclock, and orange clock does the same!
(WARNING, EXPLICIT SCENE TO NOT WATCH IF YOU DON'T LIKE GETTING TURNED ON.)

2. SBC's Metal Concert
SBC goes to enjoy some fine Metal Music. He's quite surprised when a Newgrounder shows up to the show and makes DELICIOUSLY UNGODLY METAL \m/.
(feat. CapnCrunchDaPimp)

3. Clock Day Baconman Collab
The best Clockday movie! Me and Joel teamed up to bring you this masterpiece. Featuring a menu song by me (feat. harryjarry) and a tune by Joel! Oh, and some ska!

View, review, vote 5!

Problem is, it was my friend's girlfriend.

WARNING, THE BELOW GETS INTO EXTREME DETAIL.

Okay, so I'm at the movies today, by myself. Reason being? No one else could go, one of my friends is in Florida, another has to work, etc. I'm getting ready to see Dark Knight. Everyone says its great. I'm getting my popcorn and medium Dr. Pepper when I look next to me, it's my friend Joe's girlfriend, Lilian.

Lilian is about 5'4" and she is 17. She is oriental, has a really nice face, and a blue streak in her hair. She was wearing a Paramore shirt, and regular old tight "girl jeans".

At first I was unsure, she looked at me, got excited and waved. We've met on like, 3 occasions. Those times it wasn't like just being with your friend and your friends girlfriend, it was like being with two friends. She's really nice.
She walks up to me and goes "Hey, Jamieeee!" (with the really drawn out "eeee").
"Hey, Lily!"
"What's going on!?"
"Just going to see the Dark Knight."
"Yeah, me too. Joe should be here in a few minutes."

The movie didn't air for about 20 minutes. We sat down at a table and talked for a little bit. Every few minutes she was going "Where is Joe?" to herself. After about 13 minutes, she called Joe and was like "Where the fuck are you!?"
.........
"Don't give me that bullshit!"
.........
"God, Joe. You're such a fucking prick!"
........
"Nope. I'm done, I'm done! BYE!!"

She hung up the phone and goes "He says he forgot, but I'm sure he's out doing something retarded with Ethan and Nick (two of my friends). And what kind of excuse is 'I forgot'!? At least say you're stuck in traffic or something that won't make your girlfriend upset!"
"Jeez, I'm sorry Lily."
"Its okay, I guess" She said. "He's done this on more than one occasion.
"Really?" I knew Joe was crazy about this girl.
"Yep, stupid, isn't it?"
"Yeah, haha"
"Well, if you're alone and I'm alone, why don't we sit together?"
"Sure!"

So we went to go see Batman. REALLY good, I'd recommend it to anyone. We didn't really talk the whole movie, just meaningless little statements during the previews like "That looks funny!".

As we left the movie, we talked about how good Ledger was as the Joker, how its a shame he had pass, when Lily says "SHIT, my uncle dropped me off and I was supposed to go to Joe's after this, he was supposed to drive me to his place!"
Remembering Joe was alone for a few days (probably going to sex his girlfriend up during that time), I said "Oh, I guess I could drive you there."
"Really?"
"Yeah, its no big deal"
"Thanks Jamie, you're so thoughtful!"
I didn't tell her the only reason I was offering this was because Joe had borrowed my Superbad DVD, this seemed like a good opportunity to pick it up, then leave.

The car ride home was much like the movies, we flipped on the radio on in my car and we commented on whether or not we liked the song that was on at the moment. Then, we got to Joe's place.

"It's dark, I'll walk you up." making a nonchalant offer as my true goal was to obtain Superbad.
"Thanks, Jamie" she replied.

When we entered the doorway, I made a comment about my DVD as if it had just crossed my mind. I went to get it from his DVD shelf. Then I walked back down the stairs, through the living room, into the kitchen where the door was, and I saw her there, just looking at me.

"Jamie, I want you."
"... Yes?" I said sounding like an absolute idiot, I thought she hadn't finished her sentence.
"I want to please you."
I understood what was going on now. I couldn't do this, Joe was like, my number 1 amigo.
"Uh, actually..."
"No," she replied, "Seriously"
She them pushed me into a counter (I went half willingly).
"I want to thank you for the ride home."
"N--no! It's really okay, it was nothi-"
"Shhhh" she said, "Just sit there, and relax."
I don't know what came over me, but I just did what she said. I was shocked with myself, me and Joe have been friends forever it seemed.
"I've always liked you, Jamie" she said, "More than a friend, that is". She giggled as she unzipped my fly.
I watch as she licked her lips, and started fondling my balls. Then it hit me real hard, I'm being a dishonest friend, I'm hurting my best buddy, I tried to think of anything that could help me avoid a hardon, dead puppies, naked old nuns, anything. Nothing worked, my penis was stiff after just a few seconds.

I felt her lips wrap around the tip of my penis. And suddenly everything stopped. I wasn't tense any longer, I had completely forgotten why I was nervous in the first place, the pleasure that my body was going through put me in a state of mental sedation. All was well for about 5 minutes. When I heard a jingling of the doorknob.

Shit, it was Joe.

I realized that we were right outside of the front door, why was I doing this? Why was I essentially cheating on my best friend? I tried to signal that there was trouble, and pull away. It was too late. Joe was standing there, mouth agape and nothing but shock and horror in his eyes.

"Joe!" Lily yelled.
"Man, it isn't what it looks like!" I said to Joe, but he just ignored what I said, walked over to Lily, and backhanded her. I cringed as I watched her fall.

"WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING!? WHY ARE YOU CHEATING!? WHAT IS THIS SHIT GOING ON WITH JAMIE!? HOW LONG HAS THIS BEEN GOING ON" He was furious, I saw tears going down his cheeks.

Lilian was also crying "I..I don't know! Maybe if you were more reliable none of this would have happened!"
"YOU HORRIBLE BITCH! I DON'T KNOW WHY I DESERVE THIS!" He was talking nonsensical shit by now, tears flowing down his face. He calmed down for a second, and looked at me.

"YOU!"
"D--dude I'm so sorry, it was just tonight!"
"YOU BROKE OUR FRIENDSHIP, MAN."
I was unsure how to answer this. I did. I broke a great friendship with a great guy.
"I really did, man. I'm so sorry, if you could ever forgive me..."
"You know what, I will" He said, his voice calming down more with every breath. I was shocked, why would he forgive me for the biggest of all friendship breakers?
"...What?"
"I forgive you, it's all right, you wanna know why?"
"Why?"

"Because I'm eating Reese's for breakfast"

I stood there, amazed at his statement. Reese's, as in Reese's Peanut Butter Cups, right? You can't eat candy for breakfast! Even if you are home alone, that is ludicrous!
I simply questioned "C'mon, candy? For breakfast?"
"No, Jamie! Reese's Puffs Cereal!" He reached into his pantry and grabbed the Orange box. "Try a bowl!"
I grabbed a spoon and a bowl from his cabinets, stepping over the sobbing Asian on the floor, and poured myself a bowl of this mystery. A splash of milk on top, and one bite later, I was hooked. There was a party in my mouth, and chocolate and peanut butter were the life of the party.

So I guess the final question is, do you like Reese's Puffs?

A COOL LIST! HOW CREATIVE AND UPBEAT AM I?!

Okay, lets start this ok

1. Jake
Jake because he was my first ever NG buddy. We chatted on AIM (lol) when I was a wee nubcake at level 5 or 6. He was really nice and helped me become the person I am on the internet (What the fuck have you done, dude?)

2. CapnCrunchDaPimp
Seth is a really funny kid. He posts on the BBS all the time, and out chats on AIM and MSN literally make me laugh out loud. He's such a cool guy. Oh, he likes pink!

3. CitricSquid
WOW INTERNET TOUGH GUY. Sam has been a friend since my early stages on Newgrounding, I've seen him be a frequent poster, completely dropping NG, to being an asshole on NG, to suddenly being a nice guy since he got his account back. What a cool Brit!

4. Bahamut
Bahamut is cool. He makes funny flash, and we talk on MSN a lot. He's really nice, and is always helpful. He really knows a lot about Newgrounds, which is why I originally contacted this fellow. Really cool, really nice. Oh, also he's 18, that means he's legal in the states! ;O

4. AfroUnderscoreStud
Afro stud has big hair, likes pink, and wears dresses. He's funny. He supplies my with great lulz when we chat on MSN. And I imagine he looks like carrot top, how cool is that? He's super tough on the internet, and says a lot of stuff sucks, yo.

5. Seamonky
Me and Seamonky talked a lot on the Conversation Blog on his profile. We had lots of fun! Now, our conversations are on AIM. We have tons of fun there, too! He is a really relaxed and kind review mod, with a keen eye for abusive reviews, but he also knows not to take everything too seriously. I made a lot of the graphics on his profile :O

6. BlueHippo
BlueHippo is a moderator. I've always kind of admired him from a distance. Then I decided I'd talk to him over AIM one day. Good choice! He's a super kind guy who will help anyone who needs it. Amazing mod too, in my opinion. He should get Hippo of the Year or something.

7. HarryJarry
Joel is such a swell guy! He always talks with exclamation points when typing! Jake introduced us, we've been pretty good pals! We don't talk a lot anymore since he's busy with stupid stuff that obviously isn't as important as me >:C. I MISS YOU, JOEL!

+ More I forgotted. If you think you should be on this list, you're probably wrong. But PM me anyway and if I forgot you, I'll throw you in.

ALSO THE FAGGOTRON LIST:
BlueHippo

+More I forgotted.

Now this newspost will KICK THE STINK OUT OF SHIT. Videos that remind me of the people mentioned above.

Jake

CapnCrunchDaPimp

CitricSquid

Bahamut

</div>AfroUnderscoreStud

Seamonky

BlueHippo

HarryJarry

Also good boobs.

(b'-')b

Hey guys.

I'm an avid Wii fan, and I have brawl. If you want to have a friendly fight, multi-man team up together, or even a homerun derby, PM me for my FC, but make sure to give me yours, first!
Aaaaand, since the wii has no chat features (Only downfall imo), it'd be appreciated if you'd get on AIM (J Bodacious) or MSN (JamieHynes@live.com) with me, so we can work out the settings and such!

Also, I generally try not to main. But my usual pool of characters is Captain Falcon, Ness, R.O.B., Mr. Game & Watch, Peach, and Luigi.

See you there!

- Jamie

I AM LARGE AND IN CHARGE.

This video always makes me laugh. Go Wii!

... So far nothing. SAD FAIC.

Oh well, I kinda like my little kid-style, it almost has potential in that aspect. It's kinda cutesy and fun. Also, I've decided I can't draw backgrounds, I'll trace bitmap for real pictures, it looks cool!

The below picture is of me living out my dream, wearing rocket-sneakers!

I'll be coming for your love, okay.

Kind of a really real news post!

First off! WOOO ALMOST DONE WITH MY SOPHOMORE YEAR OF HIGH SCHOOL!!! Finally! A summer of nothing but work, internets and video games! I get out the 17th!

I've been playing with code and stuff from the wonderful teachings of DVS. I'm also just practicing some basic animations. I'm coming along quite well! I might be able to submit a few things this summer!

Have a good one!

UR PAL,

JAMESTER.